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New OT thread
Forums > Offtopic Forum
Made Me Laugh (18 comments)
( Forum: OT)
Posted by Lethe @ 17:48 CDT, 6 August 2009 - iMsg
http://www.kontraband.com/pics/18870/I-3-U/
Edited by netrex at 21:49 CDT, 6 August 2009 - 3456 Hits

<< prev OT thread || next OT thread >>


<< Comment #1 @ 18:00 CDT, 6 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By l0wfly funnyb 
made me go faek
<< Comment #2 @ 18:08 CDT, 6 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Earth Lethe  - Reply to #1
well when you read her lines its pretty dramatic so its prolly fake but still
<< Comment #3 @ 18:11 CDT, 6 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By l0wfly funnyb  - Reply to #2
either its fake or the guy is a social genious

my guess is fake though
<< Comment #6 @ 08:26 CDT, 7 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By hearpts rockz  - Reply to #2
u got punk'd
<< Comment #4 @ 07:23 CDT, 7 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By QuakeLive.cz baron Railgun 
czm rules anywayz
<< Comment #9 @ 17:12 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Unset 26671  - Reply to #4
nice
<< Comment #5 @ 07:36 CDT, 7 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By SC_Zerg [mash] 
pretty good. :D
<< Comment #7 @ 09:34 CDT, 7 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Quake 3 wocK_ 
hah very nice

:)
<< Comment #8 @ 16:39 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By rammstein *deotrip butcher_kgp 
ahha lol
<< Comment #10 @ 17:15 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By US-Ohio TAFKAagardenchair 
Never seen an imaginary number denoted by "u". i for the imaginary unit in |C and j for the quaternions, but u...mh
<< Comment #11 @ 17:17 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Earth Lethe  - Reply to #10
i thought its "i lesser than 3" u, so "u" wouldn't have anything to do with it.

=/
<< Comment #14 @ 03:23 CDT, 22 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By US-Ohio TAFKAagardenchair  - Reply to #11
I don't know what that means
<< Comment #15 @ 03:36 CDT, 22 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Earth Lethe  - Reply to #14
Random Gay Dude : i lesser than 3 u
Agardenchair: how the fuck can you lesser than 3 me?

=/

now?
<< Comment #16 @ 04:20 CDT, 22 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By US-Ohio TAFKAagardenchair  - Reply to #15
ahah your so pathetic...you took the time to comment on this you LOSER so look whos a random gay dude now? oh i think its you
<< Comment #17 @ 04:22 CDT, 22 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Earth Lethe  - Reply to #16
you managed to took offense from a post that had no insult whatsoever. that's no easy task.

:D
<< Comment #12 @ 18:25 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By Dird's Xmas tree ;o Bob 
.
Edited by Bob at 22:23 CDT, 27 June 2024
<< Comment #13 @ 19:15 CDT, 21 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By clawo ini 
Too many fully and correctly spelt words from .co.uk for it to be real.
5%
<< Comment #18 @ 05:23 CDT, 22 August 2009 >>
(Link, Reply)
By US-Ohio TAFKAagardenchair 
Ireland
  • J.J.
<JIM> I would like you to wear drawers with three or four frills one over the other at the knees and up the thighs and great crimson bows in them, I mean not schoolgirls' drawers with a thin shabby lace border, thigh round the legs and so thin that the flesh shows with a full loose bottom and wide legs, all frills and lace and ribbons, and heavy with perfume so that whenever you show them, whether in pulling up your clothes hastily to do something or cuddling yourself up prettily to be blocked, I can see only a swelling mass of white stuff and frills and so that when I bend down over you to open them and give you a burning lustful kiss on your naughty bare bum I can smell the perfume of your drawers as well as the warm odour of your cunt and the heavy smell of your behind.

<JIM> Have I shocked you by the dirty things I wrote to you? You think perhaps that my love is a filthy thing. It is, darling, at some moments. I dream of you in filthy poses sometimes. I imagine things so very dirty that I will not write them until I see how you write yourself. The smallest things give me a great cockstand - a whorish movement of your mouth, a little brown stain on the seat of your white drawers, a sudden dirty word spluttered out by your wet lips, a sudden immodest noise made by you behind and then a bad smell slowly curling up out of your backside. At such moments I feel mad to do it in some filthy way, to feel your hot lecherous lips sucking away at me, to fuck between your two rosy-tipped bubbies, to come on your face and squirt it over your hot cheeks and eyes, to stick it between the cheeks of your rump and bugger you.

<JIM> Basta per stasera!

<JIM> My sweet little whorish Nora I did as you told me, you dirty little girl, and pulled myself off twice when I read your letter. I am delighted to see that you do like being fucked arseways. Yes, now I can remember that night when I fucked you for so long backwards. It was the dirtiest fucking I ever gave you, darling. My prick was stuck in you for hours, fucking in and out under your upturned rump. I felt your fat sweaty buttocks under my belly and saw your flushed face and mad eyes. At every fuck I gave you your shameless tongue came bursting out through your lips and if a gave you a bigger stronger fuck than usual, fat dirty farts came spluttering out of your backside. You had an arse full of farts that night, darling, and I fucked them out of you, big fat fellows, long windy ones, quick little merry cracks and a lot of tiny little naughty farties ending in a long gush from your hole. It is wonderful to fuck a farting woman when every fuck drives one out of her. I think I would know Nora's fart anywhere. I think I could pick hers out in a roomful of farting women. It is a rather girlish noise not like the wet windy fart which I imagine fat wives have. It is sudden and dry and dirty like what a bold girl would let off in fun in a school dormitory at night. I hope Nora will let off no end of her farts in my face so that I may know their smell also.

<JIM> You say when I go back you will suck me off and you want me to lick your cunt, you little depraved blackguard. I hope you will surprise me some time when I am asleep dressed, steal over to me with a whore's glow in your slumberous eyes, gently undo button after button in the fly of my trousers and gently take out your lover's fat mickey, lap it up in your moist mouth and suck away at it till it gets fatter and stiffer and comes off in your mouth. Sometimes too I shall surprise you asleep, lift up your skirts and open your drawers gently, then lie down gently by you and begin to lick lazily round your bush. You will begin to stir uneasily then I will lick the lips of my darling's cunt. You will begin to groan and grunt and sigh and fart with lust in your sleep. Then I will lick up faster and faster like a ravenous dog until your cunt is a mass of slime and your body wriggling wildly.

<JIM> Goodnight, my little farting Nora, my dirty little fuckbird! There is one lovely word, darling, you have underlined to make me pull myself off better. Write me more about that and yourself, sweetly, dirtier, dirtier.

<JIM> My sweet naughty little fuckbird, Here is another note to buy pretty drawers or stockings or garters. Buy whorish drawers, love, and be sure you sprinkle the legs of them with some nice sent and also discolour them just a little behind.

<JIM> You seem anxious to know how I received your letter which you say is worse than mine. How is it worse than mine, love? Yes, it is worse in one part or two. I mean the part where you say what you will do with your tongue (I don't mean sucking me off) and in that lovely word you write so big and underline, you little blackguard. It is thrilling to hear that word (and one or two others you have not written) on a girl's lips. But I wish you spoke of yourself and not of me. Write me a long long letter , full of that and other things, about yourself, darling. You know now how to give me a cockstand. Tell me the smallest things about yourself so long as they are obscene and secret and filthy. Write nothing else. Let every sentence be full of dirty immodest words and sounds. They are all lovely to hear and to see on paper even but the dirtiest are the most beautiful.

<JIM> The two parts of your body which do dirty things are the loveliest to me. I prefer your arse, darling, to your bubbies because it does such a dirty thing. I love your cunt not so much because it is the part I block but because it does another dirty thing. I could lie frigging all day looking at the divine word you wrote and at the thing you said you would do with your tongue. I wish I could hear your lips spluttering those heavenly exciting filthy words, see your mouth making dirty sounds and noises, feel your body wriggling under me, hear and smell the dirty fat girlish farts going pop pop out of your pretty bare girlish bum and fuck fuck fuck fuck my naughty little hot fuckbird's cunt for ever.

<JIM> I am happy now, because my little whore tells me she wants me to roger her arseways and wants me to fuck her mouth and wants to unbutton me and pull out my mickey and suck it off like a teat. More and dirtier than this she wants to do, my little naked fucker, my naughty wriggling little frigger, my sweet dirty little farter.

<JIM> Goodnight, my little cuntie I am going to lie down and pull at myself until I come. Write more and dirtier, darling. Tickle your little cockey while you write to make you say worse and worse. Write the dirty words big and underline them and kiss them and hold them for a moment to your sweet hot cunt, darling, and also pull up your dress a moment and hold them under your dear little farting bum. Do more if you wish and send the letter then to me, my darling brown-arsed fuckbird.

<JIM> My sweet darling girl At last you write to me! You must have given that naughty little cunt of yours a most ferocious frigging to write me such a disjointed letter. As for me, darling, I am so played out that you would have to lick me for a good hour before I could get a horn stiff enough even to put into you, to say nothing of blocking you. I have done so much and so often that I am afraid to look to see how that thing I had is after all I have done to myself. Darling, please don't fuck me too much when I go back. Fuck all you can out of me for the first night or so but make me get myself cured. The fucking must all be done by you, darling as I am so small and soft now that no girl in Europe except yourself would waste her time trying the job. Fuck me, darling, in as many new ways as your lust will suggest. Fuck me dressed in your full outdoor costume with your hat and veil on, your face flushed with the cold and wind and rain and your boots muddy, either straddling across my legs when I am sitting in a chair and riding me up and down with the frills of your drawers showing and my cock sticking up stiff in your cunt or riding me over the back of the sofa. Fuck me naked with your hat and stockings on only flat on the floor with a crimson flower in your hole behind, riding me like a man with your thighs between mine and your rump very fat. Fuck me in your dressing gown (I hope you have that nice one) with nothing on under it, opening it suddenly and showing me your belly and thighs and back an pulling me on top of you on the kitchen table. Fuck me into you arseways, lying on your face on the bed, with your hair flying loose naked but with a lovely scented pair of pink drawers opened shamelessly behind and half sleeping down over your peeping bum. Fuck me on the stairs in the dark, like a nursery-maid fucking her soldier, unbuttoning his trousers gently and slipping her hand in his fly and fiddling with his shirt and feeling it getting wet and then pulling it gently up and fiddling with his two bursting balls and at last pulling out boldly the mickey she loves to handle and frigging it for him softly, murmuring into his ear dirty words and dirty stories that other girls told her and dirty things she said, and all the time pissing her drawers with pleasure and letting off soft warm quiet little farts behind until her own girlish cockey is as stiff as his and suddenly sticking him up in her and riding him.

<JIM> My sweet naughty girl I got your hot letter tonight and have been trying to picture you frigging your cunt in the closet. How do you do it? Do you stand against the wall with your hand tickling up under your clothes or do you squat down on the hole with your skirts up and your hand hard at work in through the slit of your drawers? Does it give you the horn now to shit? I wonder how you can do it. Do you come in the act of shitting or do you frig yourself off first and then shit? It must be a fearfully lecherous thing to see a girl with her clothes up frigging furiously at her cunt, to see her pretty white drawers pulled open behind and her bum sticking out and a fat brown thing stuck half-way out of her hole. You say you will shit your drawers, dear, and let me fuck you then. I would like to hear you shit them, dear, first and then fuck you. Some night when we are somewhere in the dark and talking dirty and you feel your shite ready to fall put your arms round my neck in shame and shit it down softly. The sound will madden me and when I pull up your dress
Edited by agardenchair at 05:23 CDT, 22 August 2009

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